Clickity-Clack, Down the Track!

Operator Standing-By: Hello, this is ****, how can I help you?
Jake: Um, hello, are you selling "Lots & Lots of TRAINS"?
OSB: Yes, we are.
Jake: Really? Like, that's a real thing?
OSB: That's right. What's your ZIP code?
Jake: Wait, you are selling it? It's not a joke?
OSB: Uh-huh. And your ZIP code...?
Jake: Oh, I don't want to buy it. I just wanted to know... It's really not a joke?
OSB: No, it's real.
Jake: Oh, um, wow. Uh. Wow, okay. Just making sure. Thank you. That's, uh...that's a great commercial.
OSB: Alright, thank you.



I don't ordinarily call numbers because television tells me I should. In fact, this was a first for me. Seriously, though - wow! I'm still not convinced this is real. Nobody makes something that goofy and ironic without serious effort. I had just turned the TV on as this commercial was starting. I was certain that it was some sort of comedy show until I saw that a legitimate-looking number was being displayed.

After hanging up, I found the "Lot and Lots of TRAINS" Website. A few gems:

Great for Train Themed Kid's Birthday Parties

THOUSANDS ALREADY SOLD! COPYRIGHT 2007!

NO OTHER VIDEOS HAVE AS MANY SHOTS OF TRAINS AND AS MUCH GREAT MUSIC OR SOUND EFFECTS AS THESE TWO AWARD-WINNING DVD'S!

...lots of “gee whiz golly” trains...

A cinematic tour-de-force. A mix of minimalism and the overpowering grandeur of the train.


Update: "You’ll see big trains, little trains, steam, diesel, freight and passenger trains, even trains from around the world! There’s old trains, new trains, fast trains, slow trains, city, country and mountain trains, even trains that blow through snow! Plus, garden trains, scenic trains, electric, monorail and long forgotten trains."

I can't believe it I didn't make this connection right away, but the reason I like this so much finally dawned on me.

Higher quality version available at OldeEnglish.org

The Bedside Drama

There's been a bed outside of my apartment for two or three weeks.

Part of This Incomplete Breakfast

God bless America.



UNRELATED BONUS
As requested by the li'l sis, here is one of the best things ever:

Any Way You Schon It

There have been eighteen members in Journey, and guitarist Neal Schon is the only one who was a part of the original lineup thirty-five years ago and is still a member of the band today, aside from bassist Ross Valory, who left left the band for ten years before returning. Journey is one of the most successful bands of all time, having gone platinum or better with seven different albums and two greatest hits records, including "Escape", which went nine time platinum, and "Greatest Hits", which went fourteen times platinum. Neal Schon should be known around the world as a music legend, but I discovered something shocking tonight.

Neal Schon does not have a picture on Wikipedia.

Still, the Neal is the sky keeps on burnin', and Journey will come to you with open arms when the lights go down in your cit-ayiyay. That's right, the band is touring even now, and have you heard the new lead singer. This kid's unbelievable! Well, almost unbelievable. I don't think he would want your believin' to cease.

Here's him singing with Zoo, the band he was in before joining Journey:



And after:

Clean is Better Than Dirty, and Dirty's Meaner Than Clean

"Nobody is moving out of here until we've cleaned every inch of this place." So spaketh me unto my roommates. And so was born Cleaning Day.


Highlights from the big event:
In order to ensure that roomies would be mentally prepared for our sanitary proceedings, I warned them about a week ago that we would have a Cleaning Day. When the big day finally came, I went to a store to pick up some cleaning supplies while waiting for everyone to wake up (some time in the mid-to-late-afternoon). I ran into a school friend and told him I was off to find a toilet brush. "Oh, yeah," he said. "I heard you were having a Cleaning Day."

"Whoa, look at this counter! See how it has sort of a marble pattern? I didn't know there were white flecks in there!"

Peter's contribution:
Attempts to sneak away and talk on the phone or surf the 'net: too many to count.

"Look at the oven! Look! Did you know it was supposed to be silver inside?"


We took a dinner break not too long before midnight (see yesterday's post if you care about the specific time (you don't)). During that time, we found that the Doom movie was on TV. As nerds, we had no choice but to watch it, which was unfortunate, because, wow, that was a horrendous movie. There wasn't even any room for ironic enjoyment. So sad. I think everyone would've given up on TV altogether if the Mortal Kombat movie hadn't been on immediately afterwards. Ordinarily I would've told everyone to finish the last bit of cleaning, but under those circumstance, that was no longer an option. Your soul is mine!

Cleaning Day!

It's the happiest day of the year!

The DJ's Spinnin' a Tune as the Old Folks Dance at Your Family Reunion