Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Clickity-Clack, Down the Track!

Operator Standing-By: Hello, this is ****, how can I help you?
Jake: Um, hello, are you selling "Lots & Lots of TRAINS"?
OSB: Yes, we are.
Jake: Really? Like, that's a real thing?
OSB: That's right. What's your ZIP code?
Jake: Wait, you are selling it? It's not a joke?
OSB: Uh-huh. And your ZIP code...?
Jake: Oh, I don't want to buy it. I just wanted to know... It's really not a joke?
OSB: No, it's real.
Jake: Oh, um, wow. Uh. Wow, okay. Just making sure. Thank you. That's, uh...that's a great commercial.
OSB: Alright, thank you.



I don't ordinarily call numbers because television tells me I should. In fact, this was a first for me. Seriously, though - wow! I'm still not convinced this is real. Nobody makes something that goofy and ironic without serious effort. I had just turned the TV on as this commercial was starting. I was certain that it was some sort of comedy show until I saw that a legitimate-looking number was being displayed.

After hanging up, I found the "Lot and Lots of TRAINS" Website. A few gems:

Great for Train Themed Kid's Birthday Parties

THOUSANDS ALREADY SOLD! COPYRIGHT 2007!

NO OTHER VIDEOS HAVE AS MANY SHOTS OF TRAINS AND AS MUCH GREAT MUSIC OR SOUND EFFECTS AS THESE TWO AWARD-WINNING DVD'S!

...
lots of “gee whiz golly” trains...

A cinematic tour-de-force. A mix of minimalism and the overpowering grandeur of the train.


Update:
"You’ll see big trains, little trains, steam, diesel, freight and passenger trains, even trains from around the world! There’s old trains, new trains, fast trains, slow trains, city, country and mountain trains, even trains that blow through snow! Plus, garden trains, scenic trains, electric, monorail and long forgotten trains."

I can't believe it I didn't make this connection right away, but the reason I like this so much finally dawned on me.


10 comments:

Jake said...

Maaaaaan...
I clicked on some of the related videos and found Lots & Lots of obnoxious prank calls to the Trains number. I'm not going to post links; you can find them yourself if you care (you don't; they're really not that funny), but now I feel kinda guilty.

I will, however, post a link to "Lots and Lots and Lots and Lots and Lots and Lots of Trains." It's pretty crudely made, but I had still lost it by the end.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_vCjZfmkLM&feature=related

Jake said...

Television, television...
I just turned the telly back on and I see a commercial advertising some sort of drink or pill that gives you "Extreme Energy," accompanied by, what else, a muscular dude bungee-jumping off of a building. Then thirty seconds later, they showed the same commercial again.

I need to go to the library.

Anonymous said...

When you fall asleep and the commercial for this is on TV, guess what you dream of?
Did you guess LOTS and LOTS of TRAINS?

You're RIGHT!

nicole. said...

okay i just thought it over for five minutes and applied to join. i'm easily influenced and don't think things over too much. also, door store is quite possibly my favourite oe sketch ever.

Anonymous said...

I think you should call
tiddy bears
but first, watch the commercial on youtube!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJUBFkVrk9s

Anonymous said...

that tiddy bear thing is from sister jack
1-800-701-0515

Jake said...

Ummm... Jessie? What are you posting on my blog?

Anonymous said...

Quality Qurap Quause I Quare.
-sister without a sleep timer(aka sister jack)

Anonymous said...

did you watch it yet?
ellen called and ordered 100, but they said if you buy one, you get one free, so they upgraded her 100 to 200 free of charge

Jake said...

Who is Ellen? What is happening to my blog?